My thoughts on intimate relations

I really do think it all depends on the man and not the race. Doesn’t really matter about the color of his skin, a good man is a good man period.

That said I personally would much prefer black men over white I haven’t been with a white guy in close to 10 years. It has always been my experience that black man seem to try harder to please me and they tend to be more physical and hand-on, which I really enjoy.

Black men appeal to me more, to me they appear stronger, more charismatic, and more take charge and most importantly they are able to identify with me.

From my experience, the white man was more of a selfish lover, and only occasionally was I treated as though I came first in the bedroom. The black man ALWAYS treated me as if I came first when we were together. Their focus concerning a woman is different.

The black man always spent a good amount of time dedicated to my pleasure and it seems as though our bodies move together with more rhythm. Plus, he just knows how to move better.

Also, I’m not sure if that’s because they are black and I’m white, a little of both, or neither. But I do love the contrast of our skin when we are lying side-by-side naked.

Maybe it could just be because I was lucky or it could be because they (black men) are more sexual and well equipped and know how to use them. White men just didn’t do it for me.

Well there are some women (and men) who prefer black men, just as there are some who like, Asian, Latino, etc.  For me, I do have preference for and always had a passion for black men … also I do find them sexually attractive.

I know this is not true for all black men, but the ones I have been intimate with. And yes, I do know that my experience is not the same for all women.

The Point I’m Trying To Make Is I’m A White Woman Attracted To Black Men.

Well, my first boyfriend was black and my first friend growing up was black.

Then there is the fact that I lost my virginity to a black man. I sure loved the one I gave myself to over and over and over again.

It is true, I have had bad experiences but everyone does in relationships. That doesn’t change my mind about anything. Things can and will go wrong.

It is not that I hate white men or any other race, the fact is I’m just attracted to black men. I’ve actually dating a few other men and  some were of my own race and I didn’t like it. It was just not the same as dating a black man.

However it has been my experience, that the black man/men that I was with made me feel like I’m a wonderful gift here on this earth. What I mean is that I felt like I was the best thing ever. He’s crazy about me, lucky to have me and loved me more than anything. I know I’m not some wonderful gift to earth, no one is all that but any man that makes me feel like that and loves me truly has my heart.

I guess, I just love a black man.

I Am Only A Woman (to Others) If They See Me As A Woman

Well, for many cause their brains are tied to their eyes. This is not true for everyone as some, men and women, have seen through my androgyny and treated me as who I am.

A woman, born transexual.

I dream of being an ordinary woman walking through life working, playing, interacting with family and friends and co-workers without anyone having second thoughts or second looks about my gender. To wear whatever I want to wear and continue being the person, employee and manager I am today.

It’s a dream. It’s a challenge.

A challenge that I believe I can overcome as long as there are kind and open minded people within my working/life environment. I have met some, who by their actions, are most definitely unaccepting and unwilling to allow success by those like me.

I am glad there are individuals and companies who would allow me the chance to blossom in my new role. In seeking employment I do check out carefully the company and know which will allow me the latitude to ‘change’ and still excel as their employee.

I am looking. I am hopeful. And I know my ‘time’ will come.

He was AMAZING!

He was not only sweet but a compassionate and gentle man. He really knew how to treat a woman and he could be so passionate in his love making.

He was all this and soooo much more to me. He was absolutely fantastic in bed!

I luv’d it, I luv’d being with him and still think about the many many time he brought pleasure to me and my body.

I felt feminine and womanly and totally loved … inside and out. He made me feel real and wanted and needed.

Whenever he held me, kissed me, fondled me … he would tell me I was the only woman he wanted to  be with.

He knew all about me and accepted me and he loved me.

I was with him for over two years and whenever he asked I was ready and willing because I knew he was real and we were real together.

He was a man, a REAL MAN, who was black and he made my world beautiful.

I still think about being with a black man (because of him) and pray there is another special man exactly like him out there for me.

What it is like being transexual (for me)

Well let me see if I can relate this in a way you will understand it.

Imagine that you live in a small prison cell, in all reality a box. You have never did anything wrong and you just happened to be placed there when you were born. Everyone (your parents, teachers, friends, the media) has tried their best to convince you that you belong there and your wish to leave is wrong (on many levels). Inside your cell it is safe and perhaps has most if not all of the creature comforts you could ever ask for.

Friends stop by and peek in and even chat with you for awhile. You can go to work, go to bed, go to dinner, go on a date so long as you remain inside that cell. It is all you have ever known and are ever supposed to want to know. But truthfully inside that cell is nothing but misery, misery that words would never adequately express.

Well, there is a doorway out of the box anytime you should wish to leave however once you leave you can not go back in. You can leave anytime you wish, but waiting outside, all those people will yell at you and judge you for leaving the box. They will say there is something wrong with you and you should just be happy in your box!! Yet, through that open doorway you see all kinds of people and most of them are not living in any box themselves. They can wander around doing as they wish to do.

But you aren’t allowed? You did NOTHING to deserve this!

A lifetime of misery? A scary, dangerous, uncertain road out of your box? Coming out means leaving the safety and security to be replaced (possibly, bit unknown to you) by uncertainty, lost friendships, problems with family covering the entire spectrum of severity. You can never undo this

I can not speak for everyone like me however this is just my way to try and explain how living life as a trans person feels, for me.

Trapped in the wrong body

Maybe, but it is me. Totally me!

Well, lets see my situation.

I was born with male genitalia but have always felt female and further feel that I should have been born female. All of my life I have been and acted feminine, it was jut natural. Just me. I was not interested much in normal boyish ruff and tumble things or sports (unless a cute guy was interested in them too).  I have always, even as a child, walked with my heels in the air, maybe that is why to this day I walk better in high heels than in flats. My Mother and others always told me that that I was considered very “light on my feet” and that I was a “graceful boy” when I was small – a even slipped a few time (alone and in front of others) and said I was a good daughter.

I like doing female things. I am constantly told that I sit like a girl, that I stand like a woman (arms on hips and leg angles), that I walk like a girl, that my mannerisms are feminine, that I am sensitive as a woman is, on occasion told that I giggle like a girl, to that I (at times) act like a girl, that I do things like a girl, that I even talk like a girl, been told I kiss like a girl, that I have the derriere of a girl, that I have small hands and feet like a girl, that I shop like a girl and  that I eat like a girl. Then there is the times I am told that I ‘b*tch’ like a girl and when I get angry I get that ‘po’d’ woman look.

I love these compliments!

I like how women are treated and I want to be treated that way too. One of my female co-workers treats me like a girlfriend by telling me her guy issues. Other women ask me fashion and decorating questions as they say I always look good and our home (with my inputs) looks so nice.  I always get invided to the women’s table/group when we are socializing as I am comfortable sitting and chatting with them. Just an ‘Honorary Girl’ I guess.

My mannerism are more feminine and walking with a sway in my hips. Well, truth be told I am actually proud of it.

You try to suppress it … but it never goes away. I have done all of the things that most men do in life to make myself fit in however the woman inside me is still there, was always there.

Plus, I am really attracted to men always have been and not attracted to women sexually. I was even told by an old girlfriend that I act more like a woman in bed.

The more I act female the more I feel like me.  I love wearing lingerie and dresses and skirts and high heels and ALL other grly things.

It is not like I’m having to look over my shoulder to see if anyone is noticing or watching that I tend to walk with more of a swing in my hips than is normal for a man. Then again, I don’t care anymore. Very deep inside me, I know I am a female and always have been.

I am female, and it is lots easier to breath now.

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“…Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” ~ Joshua 1:9 (NKJV)

Something I Discovered About Myself When I Was Around 12 Or 13

I like the idea of being with a man sexually, even when I I was young I knew it (though did not act on it then).

I  am really turned on by the little touches, the protectiveness, the arm around the waist, and so on.

I do see some men that I think are ‘hot’ or ‘cute’ and am turned on just seeing him. Though this is not true for all men.

I see myself as a woman. I am a woman. I am attracted to men.

Facts of life for me.

I want a man in my life to treat me as the woman I am and maybe even his woman.

So if you have any questions, just fix us a cup of tea (or other relaxing beverage), sit down, take your shoes off and set a spell and we’ll talk.

Yes, I have had a few sexual partners

Count them on to hands.

But I have been very very satisfied by the men in my life.

As have they by me, since I never received a complaint but rather praise from my partners.

Not bragging in any way.

Just know that if it is worth doing … it is worth doing well!

Wonderful experiences I will cherish forever. Hopefully more to come.

Love intelligent black men

An intelligent black man is super sexy and such a turn.

There is nothing like a black man who can stimulate your mind and heart without missing a beat.

He doesn’t have to be, looks wise a GQ model.

The funny thing is that after knowing him, he can looks GQ without to much effort.

There are a few, some and rare to be sure. Not all are ghetto thugs.

But that pretty much can define all of us as it is not 100% across the board for everyone being intelligent.

Yes, there are strong, spiritual, intelligent, loving, and passionate black men.

I have know a few in my time.

I am a female at heart

For me, I love men and can’t live without them.

It is fun and fulfilling to be with the right man.

When I am wearing a nice knee length skirt and seeing his reaction when he carefully puts his hand on my crossed knee while at the theater …  it’s worth it!

It is not like a a switch gets turned on in me when I slip on a pair of heels that I want to be with a man … it is in the ‘on’ position ALL the time.

I really like men and being with them.

Actually, I love dating guys and would never ever miss a chance to date a gentleman.

It is just a matter of finding him.